I find it very interesting that people care more about my life now than when I was suicidal.
Let me explain. When I was down and depressed and needed help I was very much alone. I know I had friends and family, but people rarely approached me about my state. They didn’t go out of their way to say they were worried about me or that they wanted my life to change. It was afterwards, when I started posting about it that people began to care.
I’m not mad at those people. Depression is easily hidden. And I wasn’t exactly open to being helped.
BUT
Now that my life is in a good place people judge. Oh, excuse me. They “worry”. Why? because I’m atheist now. I’ve turned my back on God all together and THIS is the thing people worry about. That I don’t believe in anything and that I drink and that I watch rated R movies.
Guys, that is not a problem. I HAD problems. MAJOR ones. But my life is insanely fantastic right now. I have a killer job that is going to lead to me getting out of debt and buying a house. I finished a book (I still have to edit it but still its 300 pages)! I graduated from college. I am HAPPY.
Why does no one seem to get this? It honestly makes me upset. They don’t care that I am happy. They just care about my soul or whatever. Why? Do they think they become a better person by taking the dumbest opportunities to try and shove the church down my throat?
I don’t hate these people either. It is just annoying. And what does it mean that you were not charitable and out reaching at the time when it counted, but now you want to change my life?
I am fine. I am happy. I am me. THIS is who I am. And guess what, I could be a whole lot worse. So deal with it or get gone.